4/12/24 – 3:17 PM
Today has been a productive day
and my body odor can testify to that.
Sweating and boiling hot in the humid air,
I almost feel like I'm drowning.
(I have to remember to let the dog back inside.)
After getting so much done,
this lull of boredom stands out to me.
An indecisive interlude of true down time.
What will the rest of the day hold?
I'm asking but I don't want to know.
It's likely to entail more of the same old
habits that I'm not proud of,
the kind of things you don't share about.
I could always be wrong, but I doubt it.
I wonder if I'll ever truly be better.
My optimism on that died many years ago.
And like my late grandmother before she passed,
my memories of the good times are blurry.
God, I need some good friends.
Any friend would be nice, if I'm being honest.
But alas, my situation is of my own making,
I'm fully aware of this dire fact.
I suppose my dogs will have to do for now.
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